I met a contentious celebrity last year; who after a while started listening to his criticism & doubting his message. From the public perception he was a strong confident person however to gain a following of readers he needed to be brutally honest and this put him up as a target to be ridiculed. His conviction then became weak – he wouldn’t back what he was saying and would constantly sit on the fence. He was getting paid fantastic money to do what he did (however it still didn’t stop it from affecting him personally). Even the best of us don’t take criticism well.
Time again I see people looking at buying properties who choose to have a friend a father, a mother go through the property with them. In many cases it is always nice to have support from those close to you but you also have to identify whether the criticism they provide is constructive & notable or whether it is just their personal opinion. It is the same people that generally have the advice that it’s never the right time to buy (and if you’re living in Melbourne and procrastinated buying you would’ve seen a 28% increase in your property over the last year). You have to be able to identify these people and decipher their message – they probably don’t even realise they are doing it. I say this as my family can do the same thing. Their support means a lot however they will project their personal opinions on to my decision and often argue the opposite side to any point. They mean well and clearly don’t realise that they do it.
On the reverse I have been doing it to my mother recently – she is going through the process of building a home & picking out colours. I couldn’t count the number of times I have disagreed with her choice because it was different from my personal opinion – however the things that I explained to her for example “avoid dark flooring because it can make the house look smaller” she listened to. She was able to decipher the things that she should actually change compared to the things that was just my personal taste or opinion.
Criticism is hard to take if you don’t really know the person, but can also at times be harder from the person you do know. Everyone can take a leaf out of this blog & think about these two things before you criticise.
Number 1. Is it constructive? – is the bearer of the information going to benefit from this criticism?
Number 2. In reverse, as the person receiving the criticism, we also need to be able to decipher – is this criticism worth taking on? Can I better myself in any way from this criticism or is it just useless information?
Trying not to take criticism personally is one thing I don’t think anyone will master as everyone is built to want endorsement or to be agreeable – it’s human nature.
Just remember ‘Criticism’ isn’t really criticism if it is articulated properly! Articulated properly it can be accepted as Wisdom.
